I'm by your side.
I'm at a loss for words honestly.
I feel content I believe in the state I'm in. I think Montanna has passed on his old actions and habits to me, which, sad to report [no offense montanna...] is a bad thing. :/
I kind wanna stay inside all the time, and not be social with my friends...yet I do, because I refuse to go into such a deep slum. [[Is slum a word? I guess so cuz It's not red lined....]]
I just started reading this book...Jay gave it to me randomly. He does things like that, so silly. It's called "Perks Of Being A Wallflower". I'm pretty sure someone I know has read this, but I'm not quite sure as to who...
Anyways, This guy decides to write to a "friend" never says the name, and changed not only his own name but whoever he talks about. He didn't put a return address...Already in the first letter there's abuse, suicide, and divorce. My kind of book I think...It was published in 1999, but written in the future. 2001 to be exact. It has nothing about 9/11 or the problems we have today. It's pretty amusing to read in the point of view.
Now I'm just rambling, and I think I kind of need to.
I finally got in touch with this dude I'm suppose to talk to. His name is Sam. I think Sam sounds like a too nice person that I never had interest in. Then again, I might just be making excuses again to not see him...I'm not sure if I'm suppose to call him back...he called me when I didn't have service. I'm not gonna lie, I don't wanna see the man. What harm will it do though, honestly?
My mind seems to be going at a million miles per hour. Jay's going to Aiken for a picture day. I'm pretty jealous that he can randomly do stuff like this, but then again, he is older than me. A weekend all to myself sounds amazing sometimes...I kinda wish I could just make a trip to someplace like Lexington as a personal trip. 2 hours vs. 8 [?] is a big difference though. Maybe after my first year of college, I'll just do something like that...It'd be nice. [[Money. *sigh*]]
Senior picture were today, and I kinda enjoyed it...AFTER I was done with my own shoot. It was interesting helping out people and running around. Made me smile a bit. It is pretty tiring though. Tomorrow I'll be working and going around and about with some girl friends and I'll probably not get enough sleep yet again.
I'm not sure why I'm just going off topic and jumping into another topic. If anyone is reading this and keeping up, you deserve a high-five. I'm not sure if I reread it I could keep up...
I realized today how scary I could be when my anger got out of control. It scared me to think about my past and remember the type of person I use to be. In psychology class last year, I remember reading about type A people...I looked back at my younger-self and see that I really was that type A person. No one crossed me and they were scared to. I relished in that fear and lived off of it...I think mainly because I lived in fear at home. That I think is a different story, made for a different blog...I'm not sure if I'll open up to that part in my life so easily. So openly in my blogger account...maybe a few stories but nothing more. I was THE punk-ass little kid who though they were big, mean and badass. Looking back, I just see an idiot girl trying to make a name.
It's midnight and I think I'm done...
Time to try another day without swears....wish me luck, because I've failed for more than a month....and this is just for 24 hours of no swears. at all.
Good night all.
~Angel.
I feel content I believe in the state I'm in. I think Montanna has passed on his old actions and habits to me, which, sad to report [no offense montanna...] is a bad thing. :/
I kind wanna stay inside all the time, and not be social with my friends...yet I do, because I refuse to go into such a deep slum. [[Is slum a word? I guess so cuz It's not red lined....]]
I just started reading this book...Jay gave it to me randomly. He does things like that, so silly. It's called "Perks Of Being A Wallflower". I'm pretty sure someone I know has read this, but I'm not quite sure as to who...
Anyways, This guy decides to write to a "friend" never says the name, and changed not only his own name but whoever he talks about. He didn't put a return address...Already in the first letter there's abuse, suicide, and divorce. My kind of book I think...It was published in 1999, but written in the future. 2001 to be exact. It has nothing about 9/11 or the problems we have today. It's pretty amusing to read in the point of view.
Now I'm just rambling, and I think I kind of need to.
I finally got in touch with this dude I'm suppose to talk to. His name is Sam. I think Sam sounds like a too nice person that I never had interest in. Then again, I might just be making excuses again to not see him...I'm not sure if I'm suppose to call him back...he called me when I didn't have service. I'm not gonna lie, I don't wanna see the man. What harm will it do though, honestly?
My mind seems to be going at a million miles per hour. Jay's going to Aiken for a picture day. I'm pretty jealous that he can randomly do stuff like this, but then again, he is older than me. A weekend all to myself sounds amazing sometimes...I kinda wish I could just make a trip to someplace like Lexington as a personal trip. 2 hours vs. 8 [?] is a big difference though. Maybe after my first year of college, I'll just do something like that...It'd be nice. [[Money. *sigh*]]
Senior picture were today, and I kinda enjoyed it...AFTER I was done with my own shoot. It was interesting helping out people and running around. Made me smile a bit. It is pretty tiring though. Tomorrow I'll be working and going around and about with some girl friends and I'll probably not get enough sleep yet again.
I'm not sure why I'm just going off topic and jumping into another topic. If anyone is reading this and keeping up, you deserve a high-five. I'm not sure if I reread it I could keep up...
I realized today how scary I could be when my anger got out of control. It scared me to think about my past and remember the type of person I use to be. In psychology class last year, I remember reading about type A people...I looked back at my younger-self and see that I really was that type A person. No one crossed me and they were scared to. I relished in that fear and lived off of it...I think mainly because I lived in fear at home. That I think is a different story, made for a different blog...I'm not sure if I'll open up to that part in my life so easily. So openly in my blogger account...maybe a few stories but nothing more. I was THE punk-ass little kid who though they were big, mean and badass. Looking back, I just see an idiot girl trying to make a name.
It's midnight and I think I'm done...
Time to try another day without swears....wish me luck, because I've failed for more than a month....and this is just for 24 hours of no swears. at all.
Good night all.
~Angel.
posted by Angel at
11:37 PM
4 Comments:
the perks of being a wallflower is an amazing book, no joke. it's one of those books where old people would read it and say that it's garbage, but it's one of those books where inside all of the shit we go through there's this beauty that you don't know what's there till you look for it.
that made no sense, but really, it's a great book.
if you don't want to see sam, then don't see him. it's your choice and if you don't think you need to then you shouldn't have to. i think that whole thing is quite silly actually. you're perfectly fine angel.
well the thing is I do need to see someone. :/
many reasons I really don't want to go into.
I just don't want to see the same guy as cam....you know?
kinda odd.
If I have passed any such thing, know that it was not a purposeful doing. I mean to pass my ways to no one...
lol. i know. :P
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